By Janina Lim|
Just this week, news flashed headlines of Robin Williams dying at 63. Like an avalanche, the memories of my childhood cascaded before me and it seemed that it was only then that I came to understand that Peter Pan was only fiction, Jumanji was only a movie, and a small part of the remaining child within me faded away.
A big chunk of my inspiration in life comes from artistic media, one of which are films. They have this mystical touch that can make you think you can move mountains or at least climb them. And the hero of course plays the part that creates all the grandeur in these movies. And knowing the tragedy of the hero in real life, well, in my case, makes seeing the movie quite harrowing. Watching Mrs. Doubtfire would never be the same knowing that behind Robin Williams’ smile, there was a lonely man.
On CNN, one broadcaster asked what is it with comedians being depressed. A reply from a reporter came saying, ‘we all get depressed.’ I cannot agree with that more than I have ever agreed with anything else. And it is in this fact, however gloomy it may be, that I come to stop myself from shedding driblets of tears and accept the fact that even who seemed like the happiest man in Hollywood can get drenched from his own tears.Robin Williams has given too much happiness to this world. Perhaps it was time that he find his.
Robin Williams has marked an extraordinarily high standard for comedy and drama. Our lives are ever changed. We will always be looking for an actor like Robin Williams. But we sink in grief in that he is one of a kind. But we also sink in happiness and gratitude that he got to share with us his extraordinary talent in effortlessly making people laugh. All the movies he casted in would never be as good had he not been the star.
Now, I have never appreciated my childhood more than ever knowing that there was one Robin Williams who touched my heart with his sparkling smile, tickled me with his witty humor, and lifted my spirits up ever so easily by whoever and however he presents himself to be on screen. By recalling his movies, I’d always remember my childhood and thus long to remain with the positivity and warmth of when I was just a 7-year-old girl.
It will come to us all, death. But not all of us will leave the world grieving for our souls when we die. And it always strikes me in awe how one can achieve immortality through the imprints of his legacy. Robin Williams is one of these great men who will always be remembered.
We will always remember his blue eyes, how full of hope they twinkle with, how the crinkles on the sides of his eyes would appear whenever he purses his lips into a wide, calming smile. That face, we will always remember. Oh Peter, why did you not think of happy thoughts?
At this point, I still don’t think I’m ready to watch any of his movies just yet. But in the future, sooner or later, I will certainly come across one of them. And by then I’d be ready to roll the dice to a five or an eight, wanting to bring him back, being the child I used to be when I first met him in Neverland.